Really interesting Faith, what a great job to come up with Headlines. I’ll never the Freddie star one , was that true ? I’ve thought about this before as an attention grabber , I’d say my latest jury murder trail price is definitely a headline grabber, but I usually don’t overthink the title as I thought there is no rhyme or reason on substack? Non of it makes sense to me, what I think will do really well don’t do as well as ones I don’t think will, although I’m not complaining at all, I’m surprised I get what I do get! Considering I’m a social worker 🤣
It is all a bit of a mystery isn't it?! I think testing things out is the only answer. Oooh that jury piece sounds fab - will take a look! Thanks Francis :)
Enjoyed this as ever, Faith! I used to drive myself mad trying to come up with a punchy headline, so now I just use pretty literal ones. God knows if it’s effective?!
My favourite sports headline I can remember was: Super Caley Go Ballistic, Celtic Are Atrocious.
There was one that I had to remember and I (full disclosure) had to look it up and I think it was from the Daily Record in Scotland when Caledonian Thistle beat Celtic. It's one of those that the more you look at it the more you admire it.
Super Caley Go Ballistic, Celtic are Atrocious.
I mean, come on A.I. beat that you algorithmic, number muncher.
I personally love a pun and even the Guardian can't resist them.
(Oh, a brilliant stuff as ever! I would love you to guest post a journalist true story on my Sub. -that would be fun)
I like your headline for this piece, Faith, as it's intriguing and does entirely relate to your theme.
I kept that front page of The Sun in March '86 with the Freddie Starr headline. Is it worth something now, I wonder?!
I do like a good play on words. Bravo on 'Danger Mouse'!
On Substack I think it does help to make it personal and relevant. I was proud of "Secrets of my granny's quinine pessaries: Were they really 'the Wife's Friend?'". That was my fifth piece, it was an unusual topic – a potted history of contraception from a personal perspective – and the headline definitely helped it get noticed and it's continued to pick up readers and shares.
"On learning the facts of life" had a second wind two weeks after I published it and is now my most-read by a long way. The second most-read so far is "How I met my match".
It's true that what comes after the headline is most important, as you want people to be glad they clicked and to read and return to your work!
I do miss the days of the creative headline Faith, and must admit to often struggling with mine, as I err towards a poetic turn of phrase, when really I should spell out what the bl**dy post is actually about!
Bin Bagged made me audibly gasp, never seen that before 😮 for my part, I’ve never given any regard to my ‘headlines’ on substack. By the time I come to naming a post I’m so sick of myself I just put whatever comes to mind first to be done with it asap
Your piece inspired me to check and see what my most popular post is, and I don't think it has anything to do with the headline. It's not even the one with the most comments or likes (which in my case doesn't mean much), so I'm not quite sure how Substack determined it is my most popular. Maybe by views or number of emails opened? Perhaps, and I could be reaching big time, the content actually resonated. It was about decision fatigue, something I have written about at least a couple of times. Your guess is as good as mine-https://beyondourwalls.substack.com/p/too-many-decisions
Interesting Tim thanks! I wonder if it's a topic that resonated - I'm only wondering because I wrote about something similar on LinkedIn years ago, posted it late one Sunday night, and it was by far my most popular article ever.
If it is all about the content, then it takes the pressure's off with Substack headlines may be.
I do love a pun, but the Internet's lack of understanding with humour is so frustrating. I ran a satire website about ten years ago and it was impossible because Google put irony in the same bin as the sinister labeling of "Misinformation".
I decided when I started the Substack that I'd only write what i want, so as long as the headline gets across the purpose of the piece, I'll have fun with it.
As long as someone's reading, that's all that matters.
The best pun headline was a Scottish football one. Inverness Claedonian Thistle's nickname is Super Cally, so when they beat the much bigger team Celtic, the headline was"
Yes that's one of the classics - whoever thought of that must have been so happy with themselves. I think it's one of the few perks sub-editors get. Otherwise it can be quite dull adding commas and hypenating all day :)
I also used to write headlines (and do some other stuff) for a living, but coming up with a headline is absolutely the worst part of Substacking for me. I feel like mine are usually bad but I’ve convinced myself they’re not really important and that if I worry too much about them then I would never post anything.
I think you're right Andrew - I feel the same when I get to writing the note with the link to the published post. The pressure gets to me and I just want it out there, so I rush what is probably a key piece of text!!
Perhaps I don't see headlines as much, but I still thought the UK press was churning out naughty, risque headlines, no? Who on earth doesn't love a good punny headline? We can probably all recall the classic 'Super Caley Go Ballistic Celtic Are Atrocious'. I fondly remember 'Swedes 1, Turnips 0' after an England defeat to Sweden when Sven was in charge.
Other than the NY Post, the Americans just can't do headlines like this. But to be fair, the NY Post had some crackers. I used to use these in the classroom a lot, English learners found them amusing, even if they were mostly bemused. There was a one about a man getting screwed by a hooker that was a hit.
And how about the Economist with Berlusconi on the cover and the caption 'The Man Who Screwed an Entire Country'?
My proudest moment - at university, I was on the daily newspaper staff (covering sport and music - I'll have some stories to share later). My university, Tufts, defeated another university, Bates, in women's football. (The headline practically wrote itself to be fair)
"Tufts Master Bates"
I love your posts. Every Friday I try to put them off until later in the day but today I couldn't resist.
Now I'm not going to be able to concentrate - I'll be trying to recall more headlines. 'Thanks' a lot! 🤣😂😭
Thank you so much Daniel, that's such nice feedback!
Well I did wonder, so I some investigative journalism before posting this by going to the shops, as I haven't bought a paper in years. I was pleased to see the Mirror's 'Long Starm of the law' pun about some policy Keir Starmer is implementing yesterday, but I don't think it's as prevalent as it was!
I like that you used these headlines in teaching and I LOVE that university paper headline - so cheeky! May be that's the main reason we can't write these now - they're just too close to the bone.
I shall be expecting excellent puns from your headlines from now on!
Interesting that you haven't bought a paper in years - my sister and brother in law buy the Saturday Guardian almost every week and whenever I'm over visiting I indulge in the same. I'm also partial to the FT Weekend (nerd alert), which is sadly rather pun-free.
As for teaching, there's a classic staple from one of those teachers' resource books (Andy might know about it from his EFL days) with headlines like 'Pope appeals to Michael Jackson', 'Red tape holds up bridge', 'Man gets nine months in stolen violin case', etc. It typically goes down like a lead balloon - these things just don't translate, but teachers love it. Which, let's face it, is the most important thing, that teachers have a good time, to hell with whether our learners learn a damn thing, that isn't the point!
Really interesting Faith, what a great job to come up with Headlines. I’ll never the Freddie star one , was that true ? I’ve thought about this before as an attention grabber , I’d say my latest jury murder trail price is definitely a headline grabber, but I usually don’t overthink the title as I thought there is no rhyme or reason on substack? Non of it makes sense to me, what I think will do really well don’t do as well as ones I don’t think will, although I’m not complaining at all, I’m surprised I get what I do get! Considering I’m a social worker 🤣
It is all a bit of a mystery isn't it?! I think testing things out is the only answer. Oooh that jury piece sounds fab - will take a look! Thanks Francis :)
Enjoyed this as ever, Faith! I used to drive myself mad trying to come up with a punchy headline, so now I just use pretty literal ones. God knows if it’s effective?!
My favourite sports headline I can remember was: Super Caley Go Ballistic, Celtic Are Atrocious.
Just perfect!
This is a classic yes! Thanks Andy :)
There was one that I had to remember and I (full disclosure) had to look it up and I think it was from the Daily Record in Scotland when Caledonian Thistle beat Celtic. It's one of those that the more you look at it the more you admire it.
Super Caley Go Ballistic, Celtic are Atrocious.
I mean, come on A.I. beat that you algorithmic, number muncher.
I personally love a pun and even the Guardian can't resist them.
(Oh, a brilliant stuff as ever! I would love you to guest post a journalist true story on my Sub. -that would be fun)
That is such a world class headline yes! Definitely something AI would never be able to come up with.
Ooh thank you so much - I'd love to do that!!
I like your headline for this piece, Faith, as it's intriguing and does entirely relate to your theme.
I kept that front page of The Sun in March '86 with the Freddie Starr headline. Is it worth something now, I wonder?!
I do like a good play on words. Bravo on 'Danger Mouse'!
On Substack I think it does help to make it personal and relevant. I was proud of "Secrets of my granny's quinine pessaries: Were they really 'the Wife's Friend?'". That was my fifth piece, it was an unusual topic – a potted history of contraception from a personal perspective – and the headline definitely helped it get noticed and it's continued to pick up readers and shares.
"On learning the facts of life" had a second wind two weeks after I published it and is now my most-read by a long way. The second most-read so far is "How I met my match".
It's true that what comes after the headline is most important, as you want people to be glad they clicked and to read and return to your work!
Thank you Wendy! Ooh it might be! I kept the last ever News of the World until the moths got to it :(
Yes the granny's secrets one was great - and it really delivered! I can see how 'How I met my match' was intriguing too - extremely personal.
I guess it's trial and error - but thanks for sharing your data - I'll keep investigating!
I just use the title to make a vague point/joke for my own benefit. I didn't realise I was supposed to put actual effort into it.
Also, what are the odds - I've dropped a Corey Feldman reference today too...
No way!! I'll have to have a read... thanks Lewis. I do get a kick out my own headlines too!!
I do miss the days of the creative headline Faith, and must admit to often struggling with mine, as I err towards a poetic turn of phrase, when really I should spell out what the bl**dy post is actually about!
Thanks Sharon! Who knows which is the right approach! It's certainly another of Substack's mysteries :)
Bin Bagged made me audibly gasp, never seen that before 😮 for my part, I’ve never given any regard to my ‘headlines’ on substack. By the time I come to naming a post I’m so sick of myself I just put whatever comes to mind first to be done with it asap
I get that! Better that way than to think of a clever headline and write the piece to match, which of course I've never done 😂
Your piece inspired me to check and see what my most popular post is, and I don't think it has anything to do with the headline. It's not even the one with the most comments or likes (which in my case doesn't mean much), so I'm not quite sure how Substack determined it is my most popular. Maybe by views or number of emails opened? Perhaps, and I could be reaching big time, the content actually resonated. It was about decision fatigue, something I have written about at least a couple of times. Your guess is as good as mine-https://beyondourwalls.substack.com/p/too-many-decisions
Interesting Tim thanks! I wonder if it's a topic that resonated - I'm only wondering because I wrote about something similar on LinkedIn years ago, posted it late one Sunday night, and it was by far my most popular article ever.
If it is all about the content, then it takes the pressure's off with Substack headlines may be.
I do love a pun, but the Internet's lack of understanding with humour is so frustrating. I ran a satire website about ten years ago and it was impossible because Google put irony in the same bin as the sinister labeling of "Misinformation".
I decided when I started the Substack that I'd only write what i want, so as long as the headline gets across the purpose of the piece, I'll have fun with it.
As long as someone's reading, that's all that matters.
The best pun headline was a Scottish football one. Inverness Claedonian Thistle's nickname is Super Cally, so when they beat the much bigger team Celtic, the headline was"
Super Cally Go Balistic, Celtic are atrocious.
I’m a copy writer and puns are required a lot. Well, I say required, I probably should have said that they’re too tempting.
I'm glad you're still flying the flag for them Dean!
How frustrating! I can totally imagine this.
Yes that's one of the classics - whoever thought of that must have been so happy with themselves. I think it's one of the few perks sub-editors get. Otherwise it can be quite dull adding commas and hypenating all day :)
I also used to write headlines (and do some other stuff) for a living, but coming up with a headline is absolutely the worst part of Substacking for me. I feel like mine are usually bad but I’ve convinced myself they’re not really important and that if I worry too much about them then I would never post anything.
I think you're right Andrew - I feel the same when I get to writing the note with the link to the published post. The pressure gets to me and I just want it out there, so I rush what is probably a key piece of text!!
Yep … “ohhh, I’ll just restack that quote, that’ll do”.
Wonderful. Those great headline days.
Perhaps I don't see headlines as much, but I still thought the UK press was churning out naughty, risque headlines, no? Who on earth doesn't love a good punny headline? We can probably all recall the classic 'Super Caley Go Ballistic Celtic Are Atrocious'. I fondly remember 'Swedes 1, Turnips 0' after an England defeat to Sweden when Sven was in charge.
Other than the NY Post, the Americans just can't do headlines like this. But to be fair, the NY Post had some crackers. I used to use these in the classroom a lot, English learners found them amusing, even if they were mostly bemused. There was a one about a man getting screwed by a hooker that was a hit.
And how about the Economist with Berlusconi on the cover and the caption 'The Man Who Screwed an Entire Country'?
My proudest moment - at university, I was on the daily newspaper staff (covering sport and music - I'll have some stories to share later). My university, Tufts, defeated another university, Bates, in women's football. (The headline practically wrote itself to be fair)
"Tufts Master Bates"
I love your posts. Every Friday I try to put them off until later in the day but today I couldn't resist.
Now I'm not going to be able to concentrate - I'll be trying to recall more headlines. 'Thanks' a lot! 🤣😂😭
Thank you so much Daniel, that's such nice feedback!
Well I did wonder, so I some investigative journalism before posting this by going to the shops, as I haven't bought a paper in years. I was pleased to see the Mirror's 'Long Starm of the law' pun about some policy Keir Starmer is implementing yesterday, but I don't think it's as prevalent as it was!
I like that you used these headlines in teaching and I LOVE that university paper headline - so cheeky! May be that's the main reason we can't write these now - they're just too close to the bone.
I shall be expecting excellent puns from your headlines from now on!
No pressure then, right? I shall do my best :)
Interesting that you haven't bought a paper in years - my sister and brother in law buy the Saturday Guardian almost every week and whenever I'm over visiting I indulge in the same. I'm also partial to the FT Weekend (nerd alert), which is sadly rather pun-free.
As for teaching, there's a classic staple from one of those teachers' resource books (Andy might know about it from his EFL days) with headlines like 'Pope appeals to Michael Jackson', 'Red tape holds up bridge', 'Man gets nine months in stolen violin case', etc. It typically goes down like a lead balloon - these things just don't translate, but teachers love it. Which, let's face it, is the most important thing, that teachers have a good time, to hell with whether our learners learn a damn thing, that isn't the point!
Absolutely - as long as it amuses you!!
I was ALSO coming to the comments to say 'Super Caley Go Ballistic Celtic Are Atrocious'!!! - the only headline I have ever retained